One thing I realized this last trip to Nicaragua was that in most circumstances you can't know what kind of parent someone is going to be before you marry them. Which freaked me out at first - what do you do if you don't like the parenting style of the person you married? How do you decide if the things you don't like are deal breakers? Is it possible to fix the things you don't like? What if things YOU are doing are deal breakers for the other person? Especially when the child isn't technically yours - I don't want to mess up someone else's kid!
Before we went to Nicaragua the first time, I had seen Davie talk on the phone to Eduardo and I had watched how excited he got when he would talk about him, and seen him play with Grady and other kids. So I had some idea of what Davie would be like as a dad. And when we got to Nicaragua, I saw some of Davie's interaction with Eduardo, but it was different with Davie's mom around all the time. This trip, with just the three of us, it was easier to identify things that maybe aren't perfect about us as parents. Things that I think we can work on and improve. But there were a lot of things that I think show how great of a parent Davie is.
My favorite memory of the trip is at night when Davie would read to Eduardo. Davie isn't a reader. He likes to make fun of me when I'm reading a lot and I do my best to not let him see if a book makes me sad or cry because I'll never hear the end of it! So Davie will grumble a little when it's time to read to Eduardo (My Spanish just really isn't good enough for me to read anything but the most simple of books - I end up butchering the story for the poor kid!), but eventually he always does, and it's so awesome to listen to them. I bought Eduardo a book (and this one) about why a kid loves their mom or dad. When Davie read them to Eduardo, he would throw in things that we had actually done. Like - I love my mom because she buys me books! Or - I love my dad because he plays with me in the pool! It was really adorable.
Remembering Davie reading to Eduardo and picturing the two of them playing in the pool makes me know that Davie is a great dad. We won't be perfect, and I know we'll make mistakes, but I'm very excited that I to get to be a parent with him. And I can't wait for us to have more kids together!
Melody, no one knows what kind of parent they will be but somehow we just get through it. Lo and behold, my daughters and grandchildren have turned out to be wonderful adults. We are very proud of all of you.
ReplyDelete